Saturday, February 5, 2011

a discouraged heart

It's probably ironic that yesterday my post was about trusting God to carry my burdens because I think I've reached the point where I am so overwhelmed by circumstances that I can't even function enough to transfer my burdens.

Jon and I have been actively searching for a new apartment. Our lease is up April 1 at our current residence and we have decided it would be better for our family to move towards Akron. We arrived at this decision because in the fall Jon will be attending college in Canton and I will continue to work/go to school in Cleveland. Akron is a good halfway point for both of us to prevent horrendous commutes.

The apartment searching process has been devastating. Everything that suits our needs (specifically: at least 2 bedrooms, washer/dryer hookup or in unit already, preferably a garage or private storage for our bicycles, etc.) is either way more than we pay now for rent or in horrendous condition. We have visited well over 7 units already and nothing feels like the right fit. Nothing. And we're running out of time because we have to give intent to vacate by March 1.

Yesterday it felt like everything was finally right: we found the perfect house for rent that exceeded all of our expectations and didn't break the budget. We had scheduled a viewing for this morning but before the end of the day yesterday the landlord called us to tell us someone had walked in and handed him a deposit for that unit. As dramatic as it sounds, soul crushing doesn't even begin to describe my discouragement. Alternatively, we went to look at another unit this man owned today. It was too small and very, very outdated (read: a bathroom with pink tiles and a blue toilet/sink basin). The main issue is we have decided that where ever we move to we want to stay at least 3-5 years. That means we may have babes during that time and we need to plan accordingly.

My heart is discouraged and my soul tired. I just want to know where we're going to live in two months! I want to know whether I need to start packing, when I need to ask beg family and friends to help us move, and where Jon should apply for a new job when his current job is outsourced to California in the beginning of March. Is that really so much to ask?

1 comment:

  1. Have you tried cuyahoga falls? Very close to route 8.