Saturday, April 16, 2011

broken

This week has been a particularly rough one for me. The funny part is that there was no particular 'breaking point'. I think some random, unexpected events coupled with work and school (and hormones due to being on my placebo birth control pills this week) just destroyed me on the inside.

I mentioned feeling so isolated in a previous post. Well, this week I also felt particularly homesick, which is random because both sets of our parents live within 30-40 minutes of us. However, schedules seem to disallow the visits that my spirit craves. I ended up taking a half day at work yesterday and it's a good thing I did because not long after I walked in the door I launched into a 2-hour session of the ugly cry. You know the ugly cry: face super scrunched up with mascara melting away and flushed cheeks. Not to mention the new formation of varying skin flaps and rolls that complement the whole process.

Anyway, Jon patiently and lovingly sat with me and was finally able to persuade me to crawl out of bed and face the world. And this morning he made me a delicious peanut butter, banana, & chocolate breakfast smoothie:

I'm hoping this week starts getting better. I know that there are much more pressing issues in this world than my raging hormone changes. But all I know if every 4 weeks I continue to experience these types of lows we may need to consider other contraception options because just the thought of this type of struggle that often is enough to break a person.

UPDATE: 2 hours after I wrote this post, this happened. Resulting in the ugly cry:
I need to never to dishes again. Then this wouldn't happen.

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