Thursday, April 18, 2013

an open letter to commuters everywhere

Dear People of the Bus,

I am terribly sorry that my 8-month-old is screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs on the bus you had the misfortune of sharing with us. I know you had a long day at work and are hoping to get home peacefully, but have you considered that I had a long day with my son? That he has an ear infection? That I'm from out of town and don't have any other reasonable way to get around than to share public transit with you?

Have you considered that I've done everything in my power to calm him down and it just isn't working? I  assure you... my son's crying bothers me significantly more than it bothers you. To know that my child is this upset and I am unable to appease him brings me great distress. This does not take into account your glares and side-eyes. Yes, I am aware he is screaming. Yes, I am aware you are annoyed. No, your repeated glares will not stop his crying. Yes, I will glare back at you until you uncomfortably break your glare. Yes, it will take everything in my being to stop myself from asking you if you want to have a try at getting him to calm down. Yes, I will continue to make eye contact with you at each repeated glare you send my way.

You can stop judging my parenting skills now. Especially you, early 20-something hipster with the iPod and what I can probably safely assume is no parenting experience whatsoever. Until you've endured the sleepless nights, the baby who is inconsolable regardless of what actions you take and the constant public scrutiny of your parenting abilities you are not in a position to judge. I dare you to tell me what I know you're thinking because then I will share a thought or two of my own with you. I would begin with something along the lines of you try and get him to stop. If you do I will give you $5. Your glasses are stupid.

Always remember that if I knew how to fix it, I would. Sometimes babies are just pissed and there's nothing you can do about it.


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