(If you haven't noticed in my writing or just from knowing me in general, I have a pretty poor view of myself and my capabilities.)
While I think it is important to be critical of one's self so that we constantly grow, I am critical of myself to a fault. I think I suck at my job. I think I am completely and unequivocally unattractive from a physical perspective. I constantly question my parenting and wifely abilities. I think I am incompetent and annoying*, loud and immature, a crappy Christian**, so on and so forth.
In spite of my faults, I do my best to love my neighbors. To treat those around me with care and respect. To give a voice to the marginalized. To forgive those who have slighted me, be it actual or perceived.
But I can't extend the same grace to myself.
If pressed, I would say the only other thing I am good at is that I am empathetic and passionate about the issues that feel near to me. My heart aches for the hurting, the broken and the forgotten. I do what I can to help, but my help is oft contingent on my convenience and comfort level.
In 2016 I want to be better at two things: saying yes when it's inconvenient and being kinder to myself. If I took the energy and passion I have for telling myself lies about how useless I am and redirected it towards doing something positive, perhaps I could learn to love myself a little bit and make an actual difference in the world. Perhaps by living my life more sacrificially I can better grasp--albeit never fully comprehend--the way Jesus loved sinful, unworthy me.
*this part is at least partially true
**also at least partially true